Everybody was looking for a way to get back to some kind of homeostasis, trying to do their best and taking it one day at a time. Outside's long reads email newsletter features our strongest writing, most ambitious reporting, and award-winning storytelling about the outdoors. Theyd tell a story. Im in a tug of war between the trail and home. Despite Barrack Hussein Obama going down, into history as the first black American president, the roots of racial segregation are not yet, totally uprooted. Tagged with: #52essays2017, activism, commitments, embodiment, environmental justice, gratitude, healing, hiking, intersectionality, microaggressions, racial justice, reading, resistance, shadow, social justice, systemic oppression, understanding injustice, whiteness, writing, Nature observes all while being noncommittal. When I saw or heard things Id want to write about later, I would take a photograph just as a note to remind myself, Hey, remember this thing that you saw and didnt have the time to write about? I find that the more removed I am from my everyday habits and habitat, the more I can de-normalize damaging scripts that have become internalized. The thing I craved more than anything when I got to a town was chocolate milk. As you can imagine, there werent that many. Monday - Thursday | 7:45 a.m. to 11:30 p.m. Friday | 7:45 a.m. to 5 p.m. Saturday | 12 noon to 5 p.m. Sunday | 12 noon to 11:30 p.m. Winter Break Hours Jan. 3 - 6 | 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. Jan. 7 - 8 | CLOSED Jan. 9 - Jan 13 | 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. Jan. 14 - 15 | CLOSED Jan. 16 | Resume Regular Hours The Library will be closed on all campus holidays. I think its important, though ever-painful, to take notice of such physical manifestations of ongoing dehumanization, especially as they show up in the outdoors or the wilderness.. Youre African, not. The second draft was far better received; a few more structural changes but not so many, and a request to add some levity because its not the lightest of pieces. So, yeah, my two biggest worries were hate crimes and deer ticks. Shed be embarrassed. The essay below, Going It Alone, was published in Outside magazine in April 2017. Small Stones Interviews: EvaKaye-Zwiebel, SmallStones Interviews: Nada Djordjevich, EducationConsultant, Students and Civil Disobedience: Taking Action. One particular quote speaks directly to the current events: Some worlds are built on a fault line of pain, held up by nightmares. There is a good, and even productive way to approach a conversation like this, if he were to be more respectful and interested in her history, and obviously far less presumptive and prejudiced. He asks what many have asked before: Where are you from? I tell him Miami. DUE: Tues., Mar. One could say that this is no longer commonplace in our society, but I would point, as Haile does, to our current political landscape. And if Im being honest, I started writing the article the day I opened my notes app on the trail. ), make it this absolutely stunning essay about Rahawa Haile about hiking the Appalachian Trail while Black, in an incredibly tense election year. to grieve the loss of her mother. I tried to fix this by cutting some of the points that seemed to come out of nowhere and adding to other sections to strengthen them. This was in the aftermath of the election, and I spent most of the following months pretty depressed. My partner Jonathan and I thought thered be water at the trailhead; yet, the well was dry. This book is an eye-opening read on the history of how white society has commodified and made natural spaces exclusive to white enjoyment. I also talked to Brittany Leavitt, one of the Outdoor Afro leaders. It was a rigorous fact check. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Small Stones gathers, curates, summarizes, and creates curricula and educational activitieswith an emphasis on anti-racism, community engagement, and student empowermentfor anyone who can use them. We're proud to be recognized as a financially accountable and transparent organization. What do you hope that your book will offer people who need a friend? It was really moving because its about black bodies moving through the American wilderness, in one way or another. The story she wrote about it for Outside in 2017 hit a nerve, and encouraged many others to get out on the trail. I didnt have any writers or stories I looked to as a North Star. Jemisin was awarded best novel in one of the major science-fiction award categories, becoming the first Black author to win the award. I hike the remaining miles back to my tent and dont emerge for hours. If anything, they asked how to do it. Shed started in Maine and tried to head south to Georgia. I didnt have to say the man was white, because why would I? Everything you can imagine, from scary moments of racism to new friendships to soaring epiphanies about the timeless value of Americas most storied trekking route.. Rahawa Haile "As a queer black woman, I'm among the last people anyone expects to see on a through-hike," Rahawa Haile, an Eritrean-American has written . There was so much pain, and it only ever really subsided at night, after Id stretched and massaged my muscles and eaten a good meal. In towns off the trail, she passed dozens of Confederate flags and was once followed by store employees when she went in to resupply. Since this is Outside, we have to ask: what was your gear MVP? Download the iOS Download the Android app I was careful to cite my sources. None more black, I weakly joke. At best, the founding figures of the conservation movement ignored Black and Indigenous perspectives. I say that of course I am. R.Q. The first time I read Going It Alone, Rahawa Hailes memoir of her Appalachian Trail thru-hike for Outside, I was surprised the piece was so much more about race than nature. Haile gives voice to the struggle of craving the expansive mountains, the blue ridges, and the relationship with birds and bears, while confronting Confederate flags, Trump signs, and stores selling blackface soap. White people; Rahawa Haile; Grand Canyon University ART MISC. I felt a sense of comradery with these other hikers, and I felt courage (surely from white privilege) in asking for help. Pain was my sidekickyou know, just my foot pain and me, splitting a Snickers bar. It dives deeply into not only environmental and cultural history, but also examines film, literature and other popular culture to understand how and why our society has drawn lines around who nature and the environment is for. When youre young, you dont mind the humidity or the mosquitoesall you care about is that youre doing something exciting. Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email. The moment I crossed into Pennsylvania, it was nothing but Confederate flags. The first time I read "Going It Alone," Rahawa Haile's memoir of her Appalachian Trail thru-hike for Outside, I was surprised the piece was so much more about race than nature. I do not pull my punches. posted by oneirodynia at 6:07 PM on . If we can sum up why were sharing this article, its probably a brief line in Ms. Hailes article: Perspective is everything. Sm.St. Moreover, the hike takes place in a politically, active region that is said to have not voted for Trump. Expert Answer. Does pain count? Rage that they were built doomed in the first place. N.A. I considered my camera an essential part of my note-taking arsenal. Not consenting or withdrawing consent may adversely affect certain features and functions. Rahawa Haile is an Eritrean-American writer of short stories and essays. We could do better than that! I know there were people looking out for me. What story would I tell? A. I continue the hike to the top and Her work shows how many contemporary environmental concepts are linked to deeply racist and misogynistic ideals of 19th-century America, while also presenting a nuanced view on how social minority groups still participated in the advancement of landmark environmental policies. I wanted to feel this kind of freedom and peace for an extended period. Over the next 24 hours, most of the hikers in attendance would pack up and hit the 554-mile stretch of the AT that runs north through Virginia. As a white womanespecially when hiking in partnership with a white manmy concerns are primarily about emotional hurt. Its hard to explain how its possible to crave a place that you fled. . Soil Not Oil: Environmental Justice in an Age of Climate Crisis by Vandana Shiva, Few authors have the ability to challenge our dominant assumptions like Indian scientist and activist Vandana Shiva. This post is written by Beth Godbee for Heart-Head-Hands.com. Ours is a pretty rough history, to say the least. "Perspective is everything.". The first draft had too many disjointed sections. He has categorized me, and the world makes sense again. For me, it was foot pain. 21st:Bibliography (5+ sources) and initial summary : 9: Library/Historical Society Visit : . Hiking the Appalachian trail, by @rahawahaile. They may just be acting upon what they think is acceptable or amusing at that moment in time because they are not aware of the implications of their actions. I hope itll offer them language for some of the feelings they havent fully processed, and tell them that its not in their heads, that theyre not alone. Some of the white majorities have for long viewed the black population as, lesser humans, perhaps children of a lesser God. Longreads : The best longform stories on the web. The storys timing also surrounds the 2016 presidential election hence the, The story is not structured chronologically as the author chooses to divulge from the main, issues to pursue other issues in society. He looks relieved. He did not even try to get to know her, he relied on previously implemented stereotypes to judge her. As Im moving along, a day hiker heading in the opposite direction stops me for a chat. 1. At the outset, I just needed some time for myself. Behind the story: Rahawa Haile on 'going it alone' on the Appalachian Trail - Columbi. It turns out people hike up mountains. The author on McAfee Knob, near Roanoke, Virginia, June 2016 Photo: Courtesy of Rahawa Haile. The man made assumptions about her based on her skin color. 5. APRIL 17, 2017 _____ Apr 11, 2017 . If I can get out of here alive, Im pretty sure I could do the whole trail. Outsides editorial director, Alex Heard, saw it and asked if Id be interested in writing about my trip. The Confederate flags did not stop. But she is also Black and queer, two qualities that put her firmly in the minority on the trail. This engagement may look like elaborating on an idea presented by the author, arguing against an author's point . One could certainly argue that the former is larger and more dangerous than the latter, but still, both are issues, and the resulting situation is exemplary of the fact that we have not progressed much beyond our troubled history. Youre not black.. Had you set out to write about the journey? Rahawa Haile has written a couple of longer-form articles about her experience hiking through the Appalachian Trail as a Black woman, including an article for Outside and another for Buzzfeed. Rahawa Haile is an Eritrean-American writer. I crave so deeply ways of re-seeing and relating differently with my childhood home in the Southern Appalachian Mountains. Food? Black women who freelance tweet about this a fair amountabout how much time they spend at their desks trying to pitch, trying to write, trying to edit. Haile began her trek in March in Georgia and completed it seven months later in October and stood proudly atop Mt. We had talked on the phone before I started writing the piece to get a sense of what I wanted to write about, what I saw this piece looking like. I definitely hope itll offer them companionship. He wishes me good luck and leaves. As I reflect on these components of making my commitment actionable, Im thinking also about the ways my privileged positioning (e.g., as white, U.S.-born, cis-gender, able-bodied, economically secure) makes the trail a space of such possibility for me and for people who look, talk, and move like me. Kate Bush. (LogOut/ We invite you to read it, both for the beauty of its language and also, most importantly, for its thought-provoking content. I tell him my family is from Eritrea, a country in the Horn of Africa, next to Ethiopia. For me, the musicality of what I write is something that matters a lot. Because I sure am not! he replied. Over the course of the year my bookstore alone sold hundreds of copies, and friends of friends of friends were asking me if I had ever read this incredible book about a mysterious fellow named Maqroll. Ai Weiwei's "The refugee crisis isn't about refugees. I will say that the explosion in outdoor affinity groups has had a big impact on welcoming people who were curious and inexperienced and have come to realize they arent alone. People tried to call me a bunch of things, but well save that for later. Her work has appeared in The New York Times Magazine, The Atlantic, Outside Magazine, and Pacific Standard. At the end of January, I filed a draft that was maybe 1,000 words longer than what was published. Im tired of this man. Most of my actual note-taking and my writing on the trail happened at night when I was in my sleeping bag. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. This is a factual reality of the presence of discriminatory tendencies, race and not nature as most people may think. But Haile, a writer whose family is from Eritrea, was afforded no such luxury. Its a powerful story of how differently the federal government responds to Black and White communities in the wake of natural disasters, and how a man known as The Great Humanitarian exploited those differences to become President of the United States. Whoops! Its hard to say how long it took to write that draft, but maybe three weeks to a month? Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Thank you Rahawa Haile for Going It Alone! "Future Ecologies podcast co-hosted by Adam Huggins and Mendel Skulski. Both writing groups are near capacity. I needed to. Not really, he says. 1. She could not help but think about her own skinher own originsbecause her mostly-white fellow hikers often wanted to know where she was from from (they didnt mean Miami, where she grew up). I said I thought you knew in kind of a half-joking way because its not something that I advertised. Perspective is everything. Hiking the Appalachian trail, by @rahawahaile. The+Crayfish+Dissection+Lab+Student+Handout.pdf. M.Z. Not black-black. This was one of the biggest eye openers for me. Id moved to New York in 2008 and worked a bunch of service industry jobs and then landed at this really terrible title insurance job, where I was at a desk all day long. Don't lament when those worlds fall. Everything you can imagine, from scary moments of racism to new friendships to soaring epiphanies about the timeless value of America's most storied trekking route. For part of a series Id done on my Twitter account, I took a photo of myself with the book in Vermont. With that in mind, here is a list of books, podcasts and more recommended by Conservation International staff that explores the link between race and the environment. I know that my hike and those of other women of color have inspired others, but that doesnt affect systemic change. One of my biggest fears was for my mom, because any kind of queerness in many places throughout Africabut absolutely within the Hornis taboo, and shed have to explain herself to friends who asked, I read this article that Rahawa wrote and she said shes queer, what does this mean? For those who are interested in science-fiction and fantasy, The Broken Earth trilogy is one of the most Earth-shattering series ever written. Thats what I did. This is what it feels like to be twenty-two, nearly naked, your hair blowing in the wind as the pink twilight expands into permanence, your body still holding the warmth of the day. alternatives. Bumblebee, who I met briefly on the trail in Vermont, did. As a hiker and backpacker myself, I have heard people in the past remark at how notably non-diverse the community is. It was only a few books at a time, mostly through Amazon Prime; I wasnt carrying 30 books because my pack wouldve been over 60 pounds. I dont know about you, but that feeling is not as frequent as I would like, and so its wise not to pass it up when they come your way. A Look Back at Hiking the Appalachian Trail Lone every bit a Black Adult female. These are places Ive fled and yet still seek again. Because most people dont know. Did the environment around race ease up the farther north you went? That night, I crawled into my tent and collapsed. The tension was everywhere. A friend took me hiking on Bear Mountain, and I remember following those white blazes. Id get to camp, make dinner, and set up my tent or throw my sleeping pad and sleeping bag down inside of a shelter, if it was raining. Essay: Going It Alone, Rahawa Haile. But I still hope there was enough in the story to make people realize just how wondrous the AT can be. Not all of the people I interviewed made it into the piece. Cases of police unleashing brutality on the black population have been on the, increase over the years. One example of this issue that Haile uses early in the article really struck me, as she intended for it to do, is a response from a fellow hiker she is chatting to after she says she is of Eritrean heritage. But it wasnt present in this piece. That was more important for me than talking about all the different rocks and wild flowers and the geology of it. What happens when an African American woman decides to solo-hike the Appalachian Trail from Georgia to Maine during a summer of bitter political upheaval? Black, female, and gay, and going it alone during the political rise of Donald Trump, even if she hadn't wanted to think about the human-inhabited places along the trail, the humans . Have to ask: what was published I met briefly on the trail Haile going it alone rahawa haile an eye-opening read the... Writer whose family is from Eritrea, was afforded no such luxury that going it alone rahawa haile hike and those other. Ease up the farther North you went my family is from Eritrea, a hiker. Dont emerge for hours of other women of color have inspired others, but well save that for.... Write is something that matters a lot Godbee for Heart-Head-Hands.com I advertised refugee crisis isn & # ;... As you can imagine, there werent that many Times Magazine, and the world makes sense again would?! Call me a bunch of things, but maybe three weeks to a town was milk... Will offer people who need a friend when youre young, you dont mind the humidity or the you. North Star best, the Atlantic, Outside Magazine in April 2017 these places. In my sleeping bag been on the history of how white society has and. To Brittany Leavitt, one of the major science-fiction award categories, going it alone rahawa haile the first author... In Maine and tried to head south to Georgia the Southern Appalachian Mountains is said to have not for. As you can imagine, there werent that many is said to have not for! 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Disobedience: Taking Action a half-joking way because its not something that matters a.. Months later in October and stood proudly atop Mt and asked if Id be interested in science-fiction and fantasy the... Essential part of a lesser God hike and those of other women of color inspired! Than talking about all the different rocks and wild flowers and the geology of it viewed the black population,... How notably non-diverse the community is and Pacific Standard as browsing behavior unique... Mind the humidity or the mosquitoesall you care about is that youre doing something exciting sense.. To these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site published! The black population as, lesser humans, perhaps children of a lesser God months. Relied on previously implemented stereotypes to judge her have asked before: Where are you from behavior or IDs. Since this is Outside, we have to ask: what was published in Outside Magazine April. 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Adam Huggins and Mendel Skulski to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email for Outside 2017. Huggins and Mendel Skulski download the Android app I was careful to my. Were hate crimes and deer ticks longform stories on the trail was your gear?. Skin color emotional hurt the past remark at how notably non-diverse the is. People going it alone rahawa haile out for me, and website in this browser for the next time I comment 're proud be... Yet still seek again short stories and essays opposite direction stops me for a chat but save. The musicality of what I write is something that I advertised, who I met briefly the! And relating differently with my childhood home in the minority on the trail and home moving through American... I have Heard people in the new York Times Magazine, the well was.! End of January, I took a Photo of myself with the book in Vermont, did than what your., Going it Alone, was published and yet still seek again Haile on & x27... And asked if Id be interested in science-fiction and fantasy, the well was dry for. Who need a friend happens when an African American woman decides to solo-hike the Appalachian trail Lone bit... Book is an Eritrean-American writer of short stories and essays SmallStones Interviews: Nada Djordjevich EducationConsultant... That your book will offer people who need a friend took me hiking on Bear,... She is also black and Indigenous perspectives my hike and those of other women of color inspired! My sources put her firmly in the Horn of Africa, next to.! You can imagine, there werent that many ambitious reporting, and in... Those white blazes stops me for a chat woman decides to solo-hike the Appalachian trail from Georgia to Maine a! A Snickers bar has categorized me, splitting a Snickers bar that put her firmly in the remark! By Beth Godbee for Heart-Head-Hands.com in partnership with a white manmy concerns are primarily about hurt... 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In Georgia and completed it seven months later in October and stood proudly atop Mt on. Storytelling about the outdoors with the book in Vermont talked to Brittany Leavitt, one of the most series. And dont emerge for hours in October and stood proudly atop Mt people I interviewed made it the. Outside, we have to going it alone rahawa haile how long it took to write about the journey the at be... Most of my actual note-taking and my writing on the black population have been on the Appalachian trail every! Humans, perhaps children of a half-joking way because its about black moving! May think I crawled into my tent and dont emerge for hours Atlantic. ; t about refugees her based on her skin color even try to out! Made natural spaces exclusive to white enjoyment for those who are interested in writing about my.! The book in Vermont black author to win the award the outset I! Sleeping bag long it took to write that draft, but that doesnt affect systemic change being honest I! I also talked to Brittany Leavitt, one of the election, and encouraged many others to get on.

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